Book 233 - A Year of Magical Learning

Reflection Title: Distraction Check!

Book – Undistracted: Capture Your Purpose, Rediscover Your Joy by Bob Goff

Book Description:

You live with a massive amount of distraction: desperate headlines, smartphone scrolling, an endless to-do list. Not to mention the nagging questions of your heart: Am I making the right decision? Am I with the right person?Will my past mistakes keep me from my best future?

Through the pithy and inspiring storytelling that has endeared him to millions, New York Times bestselling author Bob Goff invites you to laugh with more gusto, dream with more confidence, and love with more intention in this disarming call to live Undistracted.

Bob’s stories are like the rumble strips on the road that make you suddenly alert to how far you have drifted from your lane. From visiting friends in San Quentin to accidentally getting into a stalker’s car at the airport to establishing Uganda’s first space program, Bob shows you the way back to an audaciously attentive life.

Reflection:

Confession Time…I HAVE BEEN DISTRACTED this past month and it has been bothering the hell out of me.

Living for 2 for Emilia has become my full-time job since the day we lost her April 22, 2020. This is my why, my purpose, and I don’t mess around. I’m dedicated to with every ounce of my being every moment of my life since the day that we lost her.

Quick recap, Living for 2 consists of me living a life filled with activities that align to my values that my daughter and I can do together. It is my way of honoring the example she set for me and finding ways that we can still be together each day for the rest of our lives.

On most days, the memory of Emilia and the battle she went through, the courage she showed, and her ability to endure through anything is all I need to get through anything. It is the ultimate kick in the ass to get to work each morning, to fight, and endure no matter what is going on in my life.

Normally, I’m ready to get to work as soon as I get up. Emilia and I start our day off with our morning reflections, write our thoughts in our journal, then turn our attention to our writing project (currently The Year of Magical Learning), read a book together, go take a run or get some exercise together, and then we go off to “work”. Work sucks but we get through it until we can finish the day with our ClubAny meetings, doing our monthly challenge, playing tennis, or whatever else is on the docket for the day.

Yes, all of this takes a lot of coordination, strategic dancing, help from Felicia, our nanny, and help from extended family members to make it work, but I ALWAYS MAKE IT WORK! I must for Emilia.

However, this past month has been a slog. Never before in the roughly 2 and a half years of my mission to live for 2 for my daughter have I felt so distracted and it has been tearing me up inside.

It all started about a month ago when Covid finally hit our household. We had been dodging it successfully since the pandemic began, but our time was finally up. First it was our nanny, then Luca, then Felicia, and then me. We were isolated from the world for 2 weeks, taking care of a sick toddler, then trying to take care of each other all without childcare while still working full time.

By the end of the 2 weeks, we were exhausted, but we made it through. I still did everything I normally do…it wasn’t easy, but compared to Emilia’s challenges it was nothing.

I thought we were through it, but then our AC went out like 2 days later in the middle of the hottest damn summer that I can ever remember. We called the AC company and they confirmed our system was shot. We called our supplemental warranty company to see if they will cover it, and they did…but it would be a weeks before that process would be finished.

We tried to stick it out in our home, but the heat and humidity were too much, and it made us worry about Luca’s safety. After a few days of trying to stick it out in our house, we made the call to my parents and asked them if we could move in for a few days until this was all fixed. Of course, they said yes; so we packed up and headed to the southside of town figuring it would be just a few days and we’d be back home. Almost 3 weeks later and we’ve been living out of our hastily grabbed laundry bags and still have a few more days to go.

We were not expecting to be here this long, which means we didn’t plan well for it. We’ve made dozens of trips back and forth from our house to grab stuff we need, neighbors are picking up shipments still arriving like normal, our nanny is coming down here to help with childcare, and I’m stuck writing and working in a home office I’m not comfortable in, exercising with whatever I can find, and doing what we can to get through this until we can get back home.

All the while that this has been going on, Felicia’s charter school that she has been launching for the past 18 months is officially ready for her first classes to begin in just a few days and her schedule is PACKED! She will be the principal at the new school so in preparation for the first day of classes she has been training new teachers, preparing for students, doing events with parents, recruiting new students, designing curriculum, worrying about school operations, etc. We’ve had the luxury of both working from home together since the pandemic began and now she is gone, crazy busy, and has a ton on her plate.

All of this combined together - sleeping in a weird space, living in someone else’s home, writing in a weird space, living out of my laundry basket, getting covid, adjusting to new work schedules, and not being able to exercise how I normally would has really put my ambitious Living for 2 schedule to the test and I’m hanging on by a thread somedays.

Each morning run feels like I’m running up a sand dune with an elephant on my back, my brain is foggy when I sit down to write each morning from the lack of sleep in a weird bed or lingering sickness from Covid, I’m struggling to find the space I need to read and think while in someone else’s space, but I’ve made it through so far.

This is my problem…“Making it through” isn’t the point of Living for 2. Being distracted from your purpose hurts me to my core. Living for 2 is a celebration of life, my daughter, and embracing what you love the most and building your life around that to make sure you are living a life of purpose. Living for 2 isn’t about what I do, some schedule I keep, or the habits I’ve built my life around…it is about Emilia.

God, and Emilia, always know how to send me the right book at the exact right time. I think I needed a reminder from my good friend Bob what this is all about in the first place. I can Live for 2 anywhere while doing anything as long as it is with Emilia and we are doing our best to live our values together. I’m going to take Bob’s advice and use my weekly meeting with Emily at the cemetery to do a “Distraction Test” to make sure we are still focused on the mission at hand, remembering the why, and doing our best to live a purpose driven life together no matter what is thrown in our path. That is the point of all of this and how I will continue to remain undistracted in the future.

Question: What can you do when distractions feel like they are pulling you away from your purpose?

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Links:

What is The Year of Magical Learning? - An Introduction

YOML Podcast Discussion - Coming Soon

YOML Bookstore - Undistracted: Capture Your Purpose, Rediscover Your Joy by Bob Goff