Book 252 - A Year of Magical Learning

Reflection Title: "Desirable" Disadvantages!

Book – David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants by Malcolm Gladwell (Part 1 of 2)

Book Description:

In David and Goliath, Malcolm Gladwell challenges how we think about obstacles and disadvantages, offering a new interpretation of what it means to be discriminated against, or cope with a disability, or lose a parent, or attend a mediocre school, or suffer from any number of other apparent setbacks.

Gladwell begins with the real story of what happened between the giant and the shepherd boy those many years ago. From there, David and Goliath examines Northern Ireland's Troubles, the minds of cancer researchers and civil rights leaders, murder and the high costs of revenge, and the dynamics of successful and unsuccessful classrooms—all to demonstrate how much of what is beautiful and important in the world arises from what looks like suffering and adversity.

Reflection:

Malcolm Gladwell is an artist! There is no denying that he is truly brilliant at what he does. How he shapes a narrative, uses his curiosity to look at the world with a unique lens, and then puts it all back together to help others see what he is seeing is truly a work of art. David and Goliath was no different and I enjoyed it just as much as every other Malcolm Gladwell book I’ve ever consumed. You will never finish a Malcolm Gladwell book without learning a lot, and that is why I love and appreciate his art.

That said, this one struck a nerve with me, and I found myself growing more and more frustrated with the narrative that was taking shape around the concept that Gladwell referred to as “Desirable Disadvantages”.

What is a desirable disadvantage you ask? Summarizing it, Gladwell gives an example of highly successful people in this world that have accomplished a lot, but did so out of necessity that something outside of their control forced them into action. He starts with the example of a few highly successful CEO’s with dyslexia who struggled mightily to conform to traditional forms of learning in this world but just physically couldn’t. That lack of ability forced their hands to find alternative routes to achieve their desired goals. This prompted them to learn unique skills that are often not taught to the masses. Those unique skills forged out of necessity then were a large part of catalyst that led them toward the “success” they eventually found in their career.

The theory is the classic take on life that adversity only makes you stronger, more resilient, and forces your hand toward creativity. However, Gladwell takes this even one step further by daring to call these uncontrollable adverse situations “desirable”. He even gives an example often people that lose a parent early on in life are disproportionately more “successful” later in life with that event as a catalyst.

Look, I get it, he isn’t wrong, but it makes my blood boil when I hear this take from so called philosophers, business leaders, and personal growth experts. This 30,000 foot overview of how society at large benefits from one individual’s uncontrollable adversity while you can sit back from comfort of your office desk and claim that someone losing a parent early in your childhood is somehow “desirable” is disgusting. That is the ignorant take of someone with no “skin in the game”, as Nassim Taleb would say.

I understand what he is saying, but the word “desirable” is where I draw the line in the sand.

Here’s why it bothers me, if anyone ever dared to tell me that losing Emilia was somehow “desirable”…I will punch you right in face. I’ve never hit a single person in my life…not once to my knowledge. I will gladly make you the exception to that statement if you said something like that directly to me in some attempt to explain the outcomes produced in my life.

I don’t care what comes of the rest of my life and my journey, I don’t care about any outcomes, and I would give it all back in a heartbeat for one more second with her in this life…I truly would. Hell, I would give my own life if it meant that Emilia had the opportunity to take her shot at living a life in this amazing world.

I get that Emilia’s death is the only reason I’m typing this sentence right now in a lot of ways. It is the only reason I just quit my job to go take on a new role that aligned to my purpose in life. It is the only reason that I will continue to create for the rest of my days as I try my best to honor a promise to her and stay connected with her. How the rest of the world views that work, I truly do not care as it isn’t for them. It is and will always be just for Emilia.

People like Gladwell might someday see the outcomes of my meaningful work and call it “desirable”, I can assure you it isn’t. I wouldn’t wish my life on my worst enemy. The art I produce may be meaningful, beautiful, or even inspiring to others, but it is not and will never be “desirable”. I’m okay with meaningful, beautiful, and inspiring being used to describe art that comes from a disadvantage, but desirable is where I draw the line.

If situations like my life is what you desire, you are missing the whole point of life!

Question: What word would you pick to describe the outcome that is produced from an inherited disadvantage?

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Links:

What is The Year of Magical Learning? - An Introduction

YOML Podcast Discussion - Coming Soon

YOML Bookstore - David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants by Malcolm Gladwell