Book 265 - A Year of Magical Learning (1/2)

Reflection Title: We will only ever listen to ourselves!

Book – Tribes: We Need You to Lead Us by Seth Godin

Book Description:

Since it was first published almost a decade ago, Seth Godin's visionary book has helped tens of thousands of leaders turn a scattering of followers into a loyal tribe. If you need to rally fellow employees, customers, investors, believers, hobbyists, or readers around an idea, this book will demystify the process.

It's human nature to seek out tribes, be they religious, ethnic, economic, political, or even musical (think of the Deadheads). Now the Internet has eliminated the barriers of geography, cost, and time. Social media gives anyone who wants to make a difference the tools to do so.

With his signature wit and storytelling flair, Godin presents the three steps to building a tribe: the desire to change things, the ability to connect a tribe, and the willingness to lead.

Reflection:

I’ve learned so much on this adventure, but one of the key findings has to be that we really only ever listen to one person when it comes to what we want to learn, how we want to live, what we value most, and who we want to have in our life.

That one person is, brace yourself…you! More specifically, not just you, but you in the here and now moment.

NOT ONCE, in my entire life, can I remember ever remember making any decision of substance on what to do with my life, who I want in my life, or how I want to go about my life because someone else recommended that as a path forward. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not long I have made ever decision on my own. I’ve had guides that I’ve sought advice from, listened to trusted advisors, researched things, and have been influenced by countless things, but the decision of what I did was always uniquely mine and mine alone.

I don’t think I’m alone in this either. Feel free to challenge me on this one as I may be more a little more stubborn that others, but I feel confident that each one of you would agree with my sentiment if you analyzed your own decisions of substance you’ve made in your own life. I’m not talking about minor decisions like what movie to see, the best restaurant where to eat dinner, or what book to read next. I’m talking about those really big decisions that shape our identity and which we design our life around.

Hell, I’m not even sure I would listen to my own self even if I traveled back in time to give 20-year-old Chris advice on the art of living and recommendations on what to do going forward. As a matter of fact, I’ve played this exact thought experiment over and over in my mind over these past few years trying to figure out exactly what I would say to my younger self that I would listen to.

After many hours of thinking on this exact topic, here is what I’ve come to the conclusion that I would tell my younger self…NOTHING!

That answer blows my mind because I know it is true. Young Chris is no different than current middle aged Chris, who will be no different than really old Chris, and who I believe is no different than anyone reading this reflection.

We only listen to ourselves because we only truly learn from doing and the memories we build as we slowly craft the narrative of our lives.

So, what if you have a really great message that you want to share with the world and need help building and leading a tribe to spread it? How do you share that message it if no one will listen?

Short Answer, you don’t. That is not your job as a leader, or as I like to call a leader, a guide.

Your job as guide is to help others shape and craft their own story. Remember, we think in stories. If you want to help someone find a path, you have to guide them as they develop their story.

How do you that is up to you. How I’m doing that is with these exact words I’m writing in this reflection and every reflection I’ve written up until now.

Give people bread crumbs and let them find their own way forward. Your job as a leader is to leave the bread crumbs, always be there when they have a question, and don’t forget to follow your own guide’s breadcrumbs as you live your own life and maintain your own quest.

We are all on our own unique quests. Real leaders understand this and help you to find your own way versus telling you what to do.

Question: Are you telling people what to do or helping them to discover for themselves?

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Links:

What is The Year of Magical Learning? An Introduction

YOML Podcast Discussion - Coming Soon

YOML Bookstore - Tribes