Book 95 - A Year of Magical Learning (Top 5 - Five Part Reflection)

Reflection Title – Sharpen the Saw: Daily Renewal + Balance = Sustainability

Book – The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey (3/5)

Book Description: In The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, author Stephen R. Covey presents a holistic, integrated, principle-centered approach for solving personal and professional problems. With penetrating insights and pointed anecdotes, Covey reveals a step-by-step pathway for living with fairness, integrity, service, and human dignity--principles that give us the security to adapt to change and the wisdom and power to take advantage of the opportunities that change creates.

Reflection:

I think it would be fair to say, before I met my daughter Emilia, that I lived an unbalanced life.

I would regularly push myself to the extremes in almost all areas of my life. I’d work my butt off until the point I would burn out, make mistakes, get sick, and unravel emotionally. I would vacation to the extreme where I would take 2 weeks to “unplug” and travel to 4 countries in Europe to see as much as I could before returning to work more tired than when I left. I would exercise to the extreme where I would push my body to the limits in intense workouts a few times a week only to have my body feel like it was in constant pain until the next workout. I would learn in spurts and then nothing at all for long stretches.

This list could go on and on.

To be clear, I wasn’t unhappy with my life at all…quite the contrary honestly. I actually thought that living life at the extreme’s in this way was a sustainable path forward to make continual progress and live with a growth mindset. This is what I was taught. Fall in love with the process, work hard, grit, persistence, do the things you hate the most first, No pain / no gain, etc. This was the path to “success”.

That all changed when I met Emilia and my family was thrust into the chaos of the NICU and a daily battle for my daughter’s life.

During our time in the NICU, everything about my old life was thrown out the window from day one. The only thing that mattered, was being there for her and being the best Dad I could be to support her. I knew that if I was going to do my job well, I had to stay balanced. I had to make sure that I could show up every single day and be present for her to the best of my abilities. For me, that meant I had to stop living life in the extreme’s, and start to try and figure out ways to live a sustainable and healthy existence.

That is where the idea of the daily learning, reflection, writing, and exercise experiment began. It was done out of necessity to keep my life together. I needed to keep my mind and body right, not for myself, but to show up for my daughter.

After she passed away, the idea of the daily sharpening of the saw routine that had begun in the NICU took on a whole new meaning. Now it was my way of trying to survive everyday without her, and to not let myself fall off the rails. Eventually, this all morphed into my way of honoring Emilia to try and live a sustainable life based on values for the 2 of us that she couldn’t live herself.

Focusing on sharpening the saw every day and living a more balanced existence has changed my life. Through these practices, I’ve finally found a truly sustainable way to live my life that seems to be on a constant upward spiral vs. treading water like it was in the past. To me, this is critical so I can go and live my purpose of “Living for 2” that I promised Emilia I would after she passed away.

Question: What unsustainable areas of your life have you been living at the extreme’s that could benefit from a shift to daily balance?

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Links:

What is The Year of Magical Learning? An Introduction

YOML Podcast Discussion - The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

YOML Bookstore - The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey